Highlights of the Year 2013

Even though there have been some difficult and heart-breaking times, the overall feel is that it's been a good year.Here are my highlights:

1) I was devastated when we were forced by the Management Committee to find a new home for our beloved cat Dyson, who was needing quite a considerable amount of care. Several friends offered to take him in, but it was Steve and Lois and their family who gave him a wonderful new home, the freedom to live out his remaining months in comfort, free to come and go as he wished, and a respectful burial when his time came.

Dyson quickly made himself at home

2) Early in the year I decided there were three acts I would like to see live during 2013; Piff The Magic Dragon, Audacity Chutzpah and Frisky and Mannish. I almost made it!

Piff (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rey_FNWQx-8) brought his 2012 Edinburgh show to the Soho Theatre in March which was even funnier than I expected, so I was happy to take a couple of groups of colleagues/friends along to see the "work in progress" for his 2013 later in the year, and then the final version when it returned to the Soho Theatre in October. He's an entertainer who really works with his audience so anything can happen, and it's his witty, dry reactions that lift his act out of the ordinary. Well, that and Mr Piffles, the World's First Levitating Chihuahua (TM). And Miss Amy Sunshine, his assistant, aka The Girl with the Dragon To-Do List. I'm glad I got to see him when I did - tonight he opens in Rose. Rabbit. Lie at the Cosmopolitan, Las Vegas, where he'll be for a year.

I almost got to see the brilliant burlesque character, Audacity Chutzpah (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLzlIjF4PIM), but not quite - she was scheduled to appear at an evening that I could just about make it to, but a quick tweet revealed that she was no longer appearing, so I didn't have to rush from the dentist. I've since learned she is pregnant/has had a baby, which would account for a much-reduced performance schedule ... next year, perhaps?

I was very lucky to see Frisky and Mannish as part of London Wonderground in the summer. They did almost no shows together (both have engaged in separate projects), but brought their last three Edinburgh shows to London for one night each to film them. The full shows are now on Youtube, thanks to a Kickstarter project I was privileged to help with, so I'll let their talent speak (and sing) for itself:

• School of Pop: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dqjQrwVS0e4&feature=c4-overview&list=UUgD0qbUhpqOAfT2slNZMeUQ
• The College Years: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fov4LubwXBA&feature=c4-overview&list=UUgD0qbUhpqOAfT2slNZMeUQ
• Pop Centre Plus: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zmfO9iBj4BM&list=UUgD0qbUhpqOAfT2slNZMeUQ&index=3

 

 3) I had tremendous fun on 4th May. Not only did I get to work the door for Alexa de Strange (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lli_oQxtckE), but I ended up travelling home late at night, by public transport, completely hidden by a silver Whosuit ...

Not me (obviously) - but it gives an idea of how I was disguised

4) I made a good friend of a colleague I have known for some years. She still drives me nuts at times, but it is a friendship that I value greatly.

5) I was thrilled - not to mention honoured - to attend the baptism of my God-daughter's daughter. I am inordinately proud of my three God-children (far more than I have the right to be), and what made this baptism very special was that my God-daughter had all of her own God-parents present.

Elizabeth with her parents and God-parents, including my three God-children Helena (second from left), Felicity (the mother, holding Elizabeth) and James (far right)

6) We've been to a variety of places and met many people with the reptiles this year - for which I continue to be grateful - but in April, while visiting a centre for teenagers in south London, I think I started to make a young girl understand that being "different" doesn't mean being "wrong". Everyone's different in some way, so being different is normal!

Bruce - just hanging around!

7) I re-started blogging. It's not as frequent as it was, and my style has changed a fair bit (I think), but my creativity is definitely having a resurgence.

8) I had an amazing week at Phobophobia! Unlike anything I have ever done before, it was scary, funny, hard work and exhilarating! It was also warm and dry ..... I got to meet some wonderful people and make some new friends. Who cares if I had less than five hours sleep per night for a week?

Kirsty having fun at The London Bridge Experience

9) I received credit and genuine thanks for a particular piece of work I was given in November. It was a big thing, or technical, but it was very important and very urgent, and I delivered. And my contribution was recognised. 

10) Fun and great food with Gingerline for the Nokia MI1020 promotional event!

My first course awaits!

11) And finally! Luc surpassed himself with some amazing Christmas gifts, some custom made, all very precious.

Hallowe'en Part II - The Best Nightmare Ever!

So for eight evenings straight over Hallowe'en (Saturday to Saturday), we were at Phobophobia, The London Bridge Experience, with the reptiles.

Our usual rules didn't apply: here, our job was to make people face their fears - or even scare them. For once, people had to approach the reptiles and go past if they wanted to carry on; we weren't going to step back and keep them out of their way! After all, the public weren't going to say to the actor chasing them with a chainsaw "I'm frightened; please take that away" ....

We were in two areas - lizards, millipedes and one small snake in the first room, Brownlow, with one handler, and the bulk of the snakes (including at least one Burmese python) in Romans, an "encampment", a little further on with two handlers. The idea was that Emma and I would take alternate night to be alone in Brownlow, joining Luc in Romans on the other nights. Emma did the first night and half of the third, but it became clear that lizards and millipedes weren't behaving for  her, so from mid-way through the third night I kept them in line .....

Yes, I had people trying to decide if I was human or a mannequin; I even had one person stroke my arm. One man, trying to scare his friends, said "Just you wait, she's going to move any second" - and when I did, he screamed! "I didn't think you would! I only said it to frighten the rest of them!"

But I also had people thrilled to meet them. One person told me he'd always wanted to see a real live snake, and that afternoon he'd been to the zoo and seen one - at a distance, behind glass. Now he had the chance to touch one. And every night I had people who were very frightened, who touched a snake for the first time and realised it wasn't anything like what they expected.

Bruce the bearded dragon received a lot of attention and was generally loved - but as it was pretty dark, he held onto my shirt and slept through it all.

In fact, faced with a Royal python, a bearded dragon, and a ten-inch millipede, it was the millipede that most people were scared of.

But what really made the week for me was the acceptance we had from the London Bridge Experience staff. It would have been very easy for them to think of us as outsiders - we were, after all, brought in as a self-contained team just for the week - but we were welcomed, made to feel at home, befriended, and looked after.

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And, of course, I was working (more or less) full time Monday to Friday - the more or less bit being that my boss agreed to me taking half a day off spread over the five days, so I was able to leave work about 40 minutes early each day. But still, I was getting up at 05:45, feeding the cat, checking and responding to emails, leaving home before 07:00, working until 16:00, arriving at TLBE at 17:00, starting the sessions there at 18:00 (earlier on certain days), working until 22:30 or later, packing up the animals, driving home, arriving home some time after 23:30, checking the animals and putting them away, then going to bed, to start all over again a few hours later .... And I loved it! I'm hoping for a repeat booking in 2014.

Hallowe'en Part I - The Nightmare Turns ....

Yes I know Hallowe'en was almost two months ago .... and I'm actually going to start at Easter!

Over the last couple of years, we've worked with the reptiles in conjunction with a children's funfair over many of the school holidays. It's mutually beneficial; for the funfair it brings people in, and for us it gives us a wider audience. Also for us, it gives us a modest income in the spring and autumn when we wouldn't otherwise have much on. Sometimes we charge the public a token amount to hold the animals (no charge for touching or stroking), and at other times (including this Easter) the funfair is paid entrance so we do not charge but the fair pays us.

So we worked with the funfair over Easter.

And didn't get paid.

The owner of the fair arranged meetings - and failed to show up.

He stopped answering our calls.

So over the summer - when he had earlier promised us six weeks work - we sorted out our own programme, and did well enough. In fact our own bookings took us into September, which was good news. And then they carried on into early October, which was even better.

But we knew we needed something for the half-term week in late October. We faced the fact that we were going to have to call the funfair and ask if we could work with them (but this time make sure we were taking our own money). We agreed to make the call the next day.

That afternoon we got an email from someone asking if we were available for the half-term week, from 18:00 to 22:00 every night, in central London, and how much we would charge for a variety of snakes, lizards and millipedes and two handlers.

We looked up how much we made with the funfair for that week the previous year and quoted that. We knew we could have asked more, but we aren't out to make our fortune by way of the animals and, besides, it was indoors! Out of the wind. And rain. And snow.

Being evenings, it also meant that neither of the two of us who have other jobs would have to take time off work to do it.

Our quote was accepted and we started discussing details. They wanted us in two locations - snakes in one room, lizards and millipedes in another. We explained this meant three handlers - if either Burmese python is being used we insist on having a second person present "just in case" (not that we've ever had any problems with either Citrine or Alexa, out two Burmese, but should they get spooked they both have the potential ....).  But since we didn't ask for extra money, that didn't call for renegotiation.

Which is how we came to be part of The London Bridge Experience's "Phobophobia" event over Hallowe'en.

They also asked if we would be able to take part in a Press Night a week before, which we agreed to do. That simply meant being in the foyer with a few snakes (neither of the big girls) and millipedes, and talking to people.

When I went to put it in the diary, we already had a booking that night. And it was one that the booker had already postponed once.

Ok, we needed to find one of our other volunteers who can drive (I can't) to pick up the reptiles and me, take us to London Bridge, talk to people about the reptiles for a couple of hours, then bring us home.

We had two potentials. I contacted them. One wasn't available. The other (who was ideal for the job as he's quite theatrical - no, what do I mean "quite"?) was available and quite keen to help, but was already in London that day and wasn't going to have time to get home, collect his car ....

We couldn't do the Press night ... unless ....

I suggested that, if we multi-boxed the snakes for travel, I could take them up by train.

It was more straightforward than it sounds. I was to go to work for the morning but take the afternoon off. I would leave work at 12:30 and be home by 14:00 which would give me time to bath, change, have something to eat, pack up the animals and support equipment, and leave home at 16:00, arriving at TLBE by around 17:15 to set up. Simon would join me by 17:45 (I'd given him directions and told him to call my mobile when he was close by), and the event would kick off at 18:00. As I said, pretty much straightforward.

That morning there were delays on South Eastern Rail and my train train was delayed by 20 minutes. Not an issue as I had extra time built in, and the signalling problems were sure to be fixed by lunchtime.

Wrong.

That day, rail transport going through London Bridge (so everything out of Charing Cross, Cannon Street and Waterloo East) came to a complete stop. Except the staff at Charing Cross weren't saying this - they were only talking about "delays" ...

After an hour, they suggested I went to London Bridge and caught a train  coming out of Cannon Street. I went to London Bridge. I was told that there were no trains at all on my line, and that staff at Charing Cross were saying anything they could to pass the problem on to other stations.

I 'phoned home, but there was no way Luc could drive the animals up to me in London Bridge and be home in time for his other booking.

In desperation, I tried to think of other routes I could take that might not be so badly affected. I found there was a train going to East Croydon in a few minutes (not covered by my ticket, but who cares?), and East Croydon is a 20 minute bus journey (also not covered by my ticket) from home.

45 minutes later I was home.

No time to wash my hair. No time to eat. Wash, have a coffee, pack up the animals, and leave. I had no idea if the reverse journey would work, but it was the only option I had.

I was now trying to look inconspicuous, travelling by bus back into Croydon, wearing logo'ed Reptile Handler uniform, carrying a rolled up 2 metre banner, and with a wheeled back containing five "bagged" snakes (bagging is something we don't normally do), their stacked display boxes, two giant millipedes, antibacterial hand gel, clean-up kit, insurance and Performing Animals License, and some A5 flyers.

The return journey to London went far better than I could have hoped, and I arrived early at TLBE, where I was met by the owner who did a fair job of hiding his concern when I explain that, no, the animals weren't coming separately; they were in my smallish bag. I was shown - well, as it was in pitch black, make that led - to the green room, and unpacked the snakes. A few minutes later the owner came through and looked equally amazed and horrified (I later found out that he doesn't like snakes) to find me with a stack of boxes containing two cornsnakes, two Royal pythons, two giant millipedes, and a two-year old reticulated python.

Next problem. I'd asked Simon to call my mobile when he was close, but I was hidden in a building under a railway arch with no signal. A quick call on TLBE's landline explained the issue, and a word with the front of house staff had this sorted.

And it all went unbelievably well! And Jade, the reticulated python, made a special friend of one of TLBE's rather tall actors.

And, yes, I AM standing up in this photo!

Secret Service

Wednesday evening. The tweet I saw read "Top secret agents required. Your first mission sign up gingerline.co.uk/nl1020 to win hot tickets to #MI1020 spy event. Til midnight spies!!"

I was intrigued, so clicked on the link and found a sign-up page for a spy-based secret dining event. Well, I've always liked the idea of secret dining but have ever done it, and the website said the location would be near to a station on the East London railway line that runs less than five miles from home .... and I never win anything anyway .... so I signed up.

Thursday afternoon, I'm at work. My mobile rings, and I'm asked if I'm available the following evening as I've won tickets!

Friday, after work, I start to make my way New Cross Gate, which is about the middle of the line. I'm still on the train from London Bridge when I receive a text: AGENTS! THIS IS THE SPYMASTER. PLEASE MAKE YOUR WAY TO ...." and then the details of where to go, what to look for, and the password. It also gives a deadline of one hour to get there.

40 minutes later I walk into the entry of an aquarium supplies showroom in east London, and am greeted by a secretive young lady in a white lab coat. Having given the password, I'm informed I'm in group 3, and told to look around until someone makes contact.

Photographs by Seánan Forbes (www.seananforbes.com)

Within a few minutes a gentleman - also wearing a white labcoat - approaches us. "It's good to see you again! And I'm so sorry about that mix-up when I accidentally wiped your memories, but I'm glad you made it back safely. Are you ready for another mission?" We confirm that we are, and are instructed to take a photograph representing camouflage and tweet it with the hashtags #nothingtoseehere and #MI1020. 

Photographs are taken and tweeted. A little while later, we are given another mission - to tweet a believable, but totally untrue, explanation of the last tweet with the hashtags #whereiamtonight and #MI1020.

Soon after this, Group 3 is assembled (eleven of us in total), we're issued trilbies, photographed, given three Nokia Lumia 'phones between the group, shown how they work, and led back to the entrance to start our group mission. We're each given a sealed envelope marked "Confidential". It's raining, so we're given bright yellow umbrellas.

One of the 'phones rings, and a message tells us to make our way to the canal at the end of the street and make contact with the spy under the bridge. We will be greeted with the words "The moon is very bright tonight", to which the reply is "Far brighter that I would have expected". We head out into the night.

We find the spy quite easily - well, she's not that hard to find, despite being hidden in a bin! Passwords are exchanged, and she asks us to take a group photograph with her. When she looks at it, she asks to zoom in on something on the wall behind her - and there's a message "Phone Val". We're told there's an old-fashioned call box round the corner, and there may be something there to give us Val's number. We find the call box easily enough, but there's a slight problem; it's in use! And the lady inside is somewhat taken aback at eleven people in trilbies trying to read the number from a flyer stuck to the inside wall of the box .....

We make the call, and a recorded message tells us to follow the map that appears on the Nokia phone. It will lead us to a burger van, where we are to ask Frank for his specials.

(It's only now that I realise that Val and Frank are my mother's and father's names!)

We find the burger van, and Frank, and ask him for his specials. His first special is a cup of mulled wine for each of us. Then he directs us to look at his specials board, and there's a line of writing too small to read at the top - but a photograph and the zoom function on the Nokia make it easy to read our next instruction.

Two doors up the road we knock on the door and give the password "Frank is sexy". 

We're let into an MOT-style garage under the railway arches, where a large man in overalls and carrying a breaker bar decides we're here to unblock the toilet. We're advised to remove our coats, and they're hung up for us. We're shown into ... well, the toilet ... but it has room for all of us, then the back wall open up and we're in a massive dining area! This is the Research and Tasting Facility. The end walls are painted white, onto which are projected various electronic screens, clocks are set to assorted time zones (including Roswell), the book shelves contain spy fiction, and there's a rather dodgy lab-type area where a couple of people seem to be undergoing some kind of thought transfer process ....

We're shown to our tables, and offered drinks - cocktails, spirits, wine, beers, soft drinks, whatever we want. They appear, and shortly afterwards a rather excitable young lady (lab coated, of course) explains to us to look out for double agents, what to do if we spot anything suspicious, etc. Next to come to us the gadget man, who demonstrates (and gets us to practise with) some of his latest inventions. These include the laser bream, which helps to find targets underwater ....

We open the Confidential envelopes we were given back at the aquarium to find some enlarged microfilm which is, of course, the menu.

We wait for all the groups to arrive and settle, then suddenly a group of white-coated people enter the hall carrying piles of small yellow cases. There is a strong smell of wood smoke. The cases are put on the tables between each pair of diners, and we open to find - well, smoke - and the first course.

 

 

The evening progresses. The food is excellent, the drinks are plentiful. There are urgent messages from the SpyMaster projected onto the walls, and various challenges.

Then, just before the dessert arrives we realise - WE'VE BEEN INFILTRATED! One person on each table turns out to be a double agent, and there's a bit of a chase. My group feels somewhat betrayed by the charming young man we had accepted as one of our own, but we console ourselves by eating his dessert ....

A few days later, after Gingerline had run five days of the event, they released this wrap video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sd_LViPjkpY

A great night! I have every intention of attending one of their regular dinners in the coming year.

A Few Days in December

Firstly, an apology for failing to write for a while. A combination of events caused this; firstly some dark days (that I have no intention of writing about at present), and secondly some brilliant times which kept me rather too busy.

I will come back and fill in some of the gaps in the coming week or so, but I'm going to start with a few days from the week just gone.

Saturday
This was always going to be busy. After a hectic time out with the reptiles up until the start of November suddenly things went quiet, so a school fair in Catford meant us struggling to think of the things that we normally do as routine. Bags and boxes had to be checked and rechecked; newspaper, clean-up kit, anti-bacterial gels, hi-viz jackets, snake skeleton, flyers, collection buckets, stretchy snakes and lizards, pictures for children to colour in .... we remembered almost all of it. In fact we only forgot two things. Unfortunately those two things were rather important - our insurance certificate and Performing Animals Licence - but luckily neither was needed. In other words, we got away with it.

I have to say, the children were wonderful; respectful of the animals and each other, polite, patient, brave. We had no screaming, no pushing the animals into each others' faces - but gentle encouragement for their friends. "It's not scary really. If I can do it, you can too". A real delight.

Which meant we were able, once we got home, simply to drop the animals off quickly without needing to check them over for damage before heading out again.

Still Saturday
We have a small number of volunteers who have helped us out quite a bit throughout the year, so it was a pleasure to invite them to join us for a Christmas meal. We chose a location that was reasonably central, and a restaurant that is normally an Asian buffet, but for December had made a few additions to its menu, so we had mixed plates of Indian starters, Thai curries, Chinese stir-fries and duck, Japanese sushi, Italian-American pizza, and British roast turkey with all the trimmings. We also had great company.

Saturday brought to an end
A year ago, we struck up an attachment with our local amateur dramatic society, The Matchbox Theatre Company, when they borrowed one of our snakes for their production of "The Complete Works of Shakespeare (Abridged)". I should make clear that the snake they borrowed was a toy one, although they did audition some live ones, which they have written up here:  http://matchboxtheatre.wordpress.com/2013/11/29/snakes-in-a-play-part-ii/. Having dealt very effectively with The Bard, this year they took on "All the Great Books" so, from the restaurant, four of us went straight on to a side-splitting whistlestop tour of 89 books in 108 minutes, performed by four actors. And a dog. But no snakes. There was an opportunity for some snakes to infiltrate, but it was missed. But we have hopes for future productions, as does at least one actor ....

And, finally, home, check over animals, put them away, and bed.

Sunday
Our corporate Christmas cards had arrived, so time to write them. A couple of weeks previously, Luc had made the discovery that Topaz, our young albino Royal python, really does not like tinsel.

Tuesday
No, I haven't forgotten Monday, much as I'd like to .....

One of the actors we worked with at Hallowe'en is appearing in The Jungle Book at The Lion and Unicorn, Kentish Town http://www.lionandunicorntheatre.com/thejunglebook.php so I planned a trip up there after work. Which would have been easier if I hadn't left my Oyster card at home. So suddenly my "I have 90 minutes for a 15 minute journey, supper and to collect my ticket" became "I have 90 minutes to walk somewhere that's vaguely north, but I don't have a map and I've never been before, supper and to collect my ticket".

I'm not famed for my navigational abilities. But I made it ok.

And the show was magical. Simple but effective set, simple but beautiful costumes, simple but ... no, I didn't mean that! Small but talented cast,and amazing animal behaviour. And @gonnasolvethis was as charming as ever. was as charming as ever.

Wednesday
In the evening, someone I follow on Twitter mentioned a competition to win tickets for a mystery dining event, based around a railway line that's not too far from me. I registered and expected not to hear anything more.

Thursday
15:30 - 'Phone call to say I'd won tickets for a mystery dining event the following evening! But that's another story ....